Where are we?What the hell is going on?

I don't know how to start this or how to explain anything thats been happening.

So Brian and I have been texting all break. Especially after I saw him. The past three days have been more than that. He called me on wednesday night. We talked for 38 minutes. Then he called me on thursday. We talked for 42 minutes. And he called me today after he was done with his swim meet. He told me he was bummed out but he feels better now that he's heard my bight and cheery voice.

And when I went to work it didn't stop. Here's the conversation we had. Imogen style of course.

B:My god this can't be happening
A:What the hell is going on?
B:You don't care a bit, no you don't care a bit
A:there there baby, it's just textbook stuff, it's in the abc's of growing up
B:frame by frame, red speed ahead. A city dissolving, the thread of our love in the headlights. It is safe now, will your arms be open?
A:Why d'ya have to be so cute?It's impossible to ignore you. Must you make me laugh so much?It's bad enough we get along so well.

but then I got home from work and found tis on my facebook:

You find your way back down.
And I'll keep the area clear...please clear the area.
When you find your way back down...in one piece.
Then I'll just be waiting here...right here.

ahhh I'm fuzzy.

uuuugggggggghhhhhh

Possibly had one of the best days ever yesterday.

Had thanksgiving at friend Megan's house even though it's like 2 days after thanksgiving.
Then went to MY house and friends munched while watching old videos that we made together along with Dance Team mess-ups.

Off to friend Annie's house! No parents home for the ENTIRE week. Anyways she immediatly pulls out a handle of captain morgan rum and all of us take shots. I had 3 and then made myself a rum and coke to look more respectable. Friends of best friends came over so they could get their pot fix. Of course I had nothing to do with it. Went inside from the freezing cold-which didn't bother me because I had my LIQUOR BLANKET! Don't you love liqour blankets?I do!
After that random things happend. 2 of best friends made out- a lot. They're both girls. I think I just sat myself on the couch and watched Pirates. OH WAIT! No I decided to stick lollipops through a banana resulting in a canoe looking sculpture. Great to find the next morning. I also thought the cops were coming because one of best friends would not comply with her mom. So me being paranoid and all went and put all my stuff in one stop incase the cops did come. Then i could just shoot up the stairs with it and go hide somewhere. It get's a little fuzzy after that.

Next morning I wake up at 9 am. An hour earlier than I normally do. No hangover at all-just lingering tipsyness still. I was quite proud that my glass of water helped me not to get a hangover. Also proud that I have an idea of how much I can drink. Thank god for shot glasses. I'm pretty sure 3 shots are my limit. My roomate did 8 in a half hour...but then she went to the hospital. Regardless...8?! So best friend insist we go to taco bell. No car. Walk to Ace Hardware and find a car drove through the window of the store! Best friend Annie's brother was working at the register. If it had gone any further in the store he would have been hit! I took pictures with my phone. I don't know how to put them on the computer though.

After Ace we went to Great Harvest Bread shop. Had our free slice of carbs-muchly needed. Best Friend Tina noticed how large their butter stick was and pointed it out to the employee. Employee then replies..OH!Yeah because it's unsalted!...because that has everything to do with how large a stick of butter is. haha.

Then to starbucks! Mmmmm tea. Needed that. I became overly paranoid that people were looking at me in evil ways. Trotted off to taco bell. Got my cheesy Fiesta Potatoes. Alas!More Carbs! Cheesy potatoes too! Just like after my stay at Knox college. It's a habit now. BAD!

Now I'm home. Still just weird feeling. No headache! Much water for me! i must find my ferret. I want more potatoes. i need to take a shower but I just don't feel like standing so I was going to take a bath but ugh baaaatthhh? I feel like I'm just sitting in filthy water.

wawawawawa

Reread last post

so many errors. I dont feel like fixing them. SHUSH!

I'm going to my friend's house today for a thanksgiving lunch/dinner! I'm so excited. It will be my friends parents, her sister, her sister's friend, my friend megan(who lives there), Annie, Cailtin, and Tina. Megans....boy is coming...we don't know what they are. Tina hates Megan's boy-who is Brent. It should be interesting. I'm just so excited to have a big dinner with friends! My thanksgiving was just with my grandpa and his love interest. I want a HUGE family gathering again. Like it was when my parents weren't divorced.

After that I'm sure we'll hang out for awhile. And then ELF is on tonight! Only one of the BEST christmas movies! I'm so excited for christmas. I love Christmas.

And then this coming week I'm going to meet up with people from my school at a mall about 45 minutes from my house. Then I will get to see Adam! Bah must go!

So I think it was...a date?

Well first I got lost going to his house, which led to my new nickname "Columbus".

So I found his house after he stood outside and flagged me down in the dark. I pulled in and we went inside. He introduced me to his parents-his two dogs. And then we left!

Got in his car and headed downtown Glen Ellyn. Get out of car and see a ton of people in the street. Their christmas tree is small...really small..so I complained about it. Went into a few stores(thrift store) where Brian asked the old ladies for UGG boots and a wind pocket watch...they only had battery...he was not satisfied.

So then we're walking andhe goes ok...so I told a friend I would meet her down hee even though I didn't want to. She texted me this morning and I was like yeah just come swing by. And some ho it came out that it was his ex-girlfriend. The ex who cheated on him and kept all the augie apparel (which cost A LOT) he sent to her on her birthday. SO we met her at starbucks...and it was awkward but in a good way because he HATES her. Then thisother girl who he semi-hooked up with a few wweekends ago came over...she's the chief sherrifs daughter. We went to a few more stores with them and then Brian' ex just said "I'm just gonna...just gonna go. I'm just gonna you know..." It was the most awkward goodbye I have ever heard. The 3 of us made fun of it a lot the whole night.

We then went to the library where there was this choir thing that his friendis in. we sat there for like an hour. Durning the time, Brians grow up friend "Byron" who is the dad of a kid he knows was like "Hey Brian, is this your date?" haha, could I have not asked for a more clarifying moment? Well he just smiled and shoot his head and said "Now why did you have to go and embarrass me like that!" Oh Byron.

After that we met up with a few more friends of his at portillos where he offered to buy me something, but I wasn't hungry at 10 o'clock so I said no. We hung out at portillos till one of his friends got a little crazy with the chocolatte cake. Then his friend drove us back to Brian's car.

Then we went back to his houseAnd I had to be home by 12, thanks Laura, and he pulled in the driveway and parked the car. Some Stynx song came on and it was stupid and I was just thinking "If he expects me to kiss him or make out to this music he's got to be joking.." But we didn't. I made it clear that I thought it was DUMB.

So he walked me to my car and opened my unlocked(not purposefully) door . I found my keys and insisted on a hug. So we hugged, a very long hug, a long squeezy hug. It was nice.And then I got in the car and he attempted to yank off my UGG boot...it's a ritual.And then I drove off and got lost again.

So that was my night...

Turkey Day

Thanksgiving...nothing exciting...I decorated...that's it.

So tomorrow...
I'm going to Glen Ellyn, IL to see a kid from my school-Brian. We're going to dinner at some pizza place...then a christmas walk thing that his town has...and then a movie. I'm going there around 5 and then i'll probably get home a little before 1.
For some reason I'm worried that it's a more than a friend thing or like..ugh.
See I would like him maybe more than a friend, but he's slept with a couple girls at school...and I dont do that.
But a lot of people do that in between relationships right? Maybe? I dont know. It's probably just a friend hanging out thing and I'm freaking out over nothing. I thought he liked this other girl. I'm pretty sure he does.
I'll know at dinner wont I. If he pays. Then I'll know. What if the waiter only brings one check. UGH ok-we're haning out. friends. just have fun. you're just friends. you don't even like him like that...that much. Just stop thinking about it!

Hairspray the movie came out a coule days ago. I've watched it ike 6 times. I LOVE IT SOOOO MUCH! I want to watch it again...but it's time for bed. I have to stretch.

I want my care package.

YES I'M A BRAT

11:42

He still hasn't called. My excitement meter has just dropped two levels.
whatev.

Brian called me today just to say hey. He told me about his night last night which involved getting really drunk and then a huge piece of wood falling on his head and then he was bleeding like crazy of course and then he had to stay up all night in case he had a concussion so he wouldn't go into a coma. haha. He's nice.

Uhm yeah...giant fangs

I'm watching the ending of Hannibal-never seen he movie- and theres these warthogish things eating a person. I didn't think they were carniverous but they've got giant fangs and so I guess they need those for something.

Adam called me yesterday. Too bad I was getting my hair dyed black so our conversation consisted of...
"Hey!"-me
"hey!what's up?"-Adam
"Oh I'm getting my hair dyed!"
"oh yeah what color?"
"black but don't worry..."
"black?what your not dying it pink?"
"pink?why would I do that, thats stupid! Can I call you back later?"
"haha yeah sure"...

So i called him back-no answer. Waited an hour, he picks up "can I call you back?"
Then i'm at my friends and I text him. He responds "nice, hey sorry I didn't call you back we were at the competition when you called and then we went out to dinner and I just got back. i'll call you tomorrow though."

It's tomorrow and it's 4:16 pm and he hasn't called. But it's still pretty early, especially for us night hawks.

Haha hello agent starling. I always wanted to watch you eat.
I feel like a never ending sentence...well that wouldn't make sence...an obnoxiously long sentence.

The leaves fall onto the shattered pavement that coats the old statues crevaces indented from the frequent blows of sandpapered fingers running down the chalk covered sidewalks of eternal darkness caused by the extending arm of the lonely shadow swinging bak andfourth like the ticking of a grandfather clock that is place upside down on a hot table shaped like a bowl of califlower gardens supporting the children like blooms of an orange wrapping their organs in a sheild of golden locks from a tear strolling down the cheek of a forgotten man.

I think I'm done now.

I'm home..so now what?

Well i've just been hanging out with my best friends. The last of them come home tomorrow-we've already planned for a fun night.

Last night my friend Caitlin came home and we went to my friend Megan's house and got a little tipsy. Well I got a little tipsy, I couldn't have much because I couldn't stay the night, so with my alcohol knowlege I figured out how much I could have and digest in time. Yeah, I know I shouldn't have driven at all blah blah, but I eally didn't have that much. If it makes you feel better I backed my car perfectly into our garage. What crazy drunk could do that? haha anyways.

So earlier that day Brian texted me and we were texting throughout the day. So then I textd him when I was drunk because my friends were calling people and I was jealous. So I had some trouble and texted him "NcDonalds befosf your mom" Not sure what I was going at...
Adam texted me this morning! I was so excited. He's at a dance competition in St. Louis-which is like 3 hours away from me. So we texted a bit and he had to class and in his last text he was like "I'll call u later". i think i'm just getting to excited. He's probably called all of our friends and what not. But I just like thinking that he thought to text me? I miss hanging out with him.

So I was stretching early this morning and I know I havn't stretched in a long time but my back started hurting! I don't know if that's normal?Does your back hurt a little when you go to touch your toes? I'll work on it.

Oh, so class schedule for next year.MWF: pre-calc(gags), chemistry 122, beg. modern dance(we have to take a gym class), Liberal studies-Mind,soul,spirit(DUMB) TTH: pre-calc(T only), Chem lab(TH only).

So I pretty much have TTH off! I'm pretty excited for that.

Just missing it already

I'm home. But I'm not.
I miss college so much already. I got a few texts from Brian being goofy. Then I got another text from my friend Jeremy. I just miss everyone already!

But other than the missing. Good things are going on. Like I get to see my 4 best friends! I can't wait for thanksgiving. That's so far away still. I just want to decorate the house all cool.

I don't feel like blogging. Just I'm too bored to blog.

Ohhhh myyy finals

Well it's not reall finals week yet, but it might as well be. I have a presentation wednesday..I'm doing a puppet show.

What else is going on outside the world of academia?Nothing really.I think I've given up on Adam...which is completely fine because I can see that he still likes his ex-girlfriend and it would jus be a waste of energy and emotions to bother liking him like that anymore.But now there is Brian. I just don't know what to think about him still. Well first of all how do you know what someone is looking for?Relationship wise?Do you just ask? Is it an awkward question? Because if we ever talked or something happens I don't want him to expect me to be like the other girls...because he has hooked up with 2 the past 2 weeks I think. This is what sucks about never having a boyfriend. It's just makes you so anxious when you dont know whats going to happen..I guess that happens regardless but I mean REALLY.

I saw Caren w. wrote to Mr.Bevans(it was on her facebook). It made me realize how much I miss the teachers there. Mr.Schoen,Mr.Bevans,and Mr.Thill are probably who I miss the most. I remembered the other day how november was whn we started making those hand turkeys for Mr.schoen. I thought about making one and mailing it to him with a letter, but then I was like-well do I send it to the school?Or is it just weird to send that?I could just go see him during the break. We should all stop by during break.

Isn't it weird how you adapt to things?Like everything about college is just "the norm" now. Taking showers in a small cubicle with flipflops, walking 15 minutes to class, only having class from 8:30-12:00, having a chemistry lab that's 3 hours long and it just flys by, eating in a cafeteria everyday, living with someone else, forgetting to talk to your parents after a week has flown by, making new friends like it's the first day of school-everyday, always having something to do on the weekends, the freedom to go somewhere anytime you want as long as you have a ride........it just goes oooonnnn.

Have you ever wondered if teachers have just forgoten about you? Like after 4 years of teaching someone they just reset to make more room in their brains. I was thinking about how well I know my two geology profs...and it hasn't even been a year. Imagine 4 years. I love knowing I have 4 years left at this school. I hve 4 more years to get to know the 7 other geology majors that I already hang out with waytoo much. I have 4 more years to party and have fun and be away from home, I have 4 years where half I wont have to work, soooo much time.

I'll quit rambling now.

The Shell is Open

Long day...Long night...but everything seems to be going so fast.

My writing class was cancelled for the day=amazing.
I got to sleep in an extra hour...but I stayed up 4 hours later than my prefered bedtime of 10 o'clock.
Went to geology club...a graduate talked about his trip to China...which was reeeaallyyy cool.
Afterwards the geotrippers went to one of our TA's houses for dinner.
We had tortilla soup and apple crisp.
I came back to school and we all went to Bingo.
I came out of Bingo with colored dots all over my face.
We went and saw Harry Potter 5=AWESOMNESS
And now I'm here...and thinking about h0w I hve to wake up early tomorrow and I have to work on my final project.
It's just going so fast.

College

Is the best time to never sleep.

It's like sleeping becomes whe last thing you need.

Just stay up till four working 0n homework-it's ok.

I keep hearing vibrating noises-like my phone is vibrating..